My wife and I had the honour and privilege to address the fine folks at All Saints' Church this afternoon. We spoke for a little over two hours about how to cultivate piritual habits in children. (The content was very similar to what we taught at the Spiritual Habits seminar. In fact, one of the staff from All Saints' had attended that one and invited us to deliver something similar at her church.)
We emphasised the role of parents as the primary spiritual teachers of their children. After the session was over, one of the Sunday School teachers chatted with us and she lamented that in her experience, many parents had come up to her to complain that Sunday School had not done a good job instilling a spiritual life in their children. This teacher was so shocked that parents were expecting the Sunday School teachers to do the heavy lifting on forming a spiritual life in the children. What was worse, many parents did not have their own spiritual lives but recognised that it was something important that they wanted their children to have. But instead of developing their own spiritual lives and then teaching their children how to do likewise, they pushed the responsibility to Sunday School.
This is sad. As Sunday School teachers, we only have 1 or 1.5 hours a week with the kids. Multiply that by about 30 available teaching Sundays, we only have 30 to 45 hours in the entire year to influence and guide a child. That's a drop in the bucket compared to the time that the parents have with their own children. As parents, we already farm out the responsibility of education to the schools. And when that's not adequate, we supplement with tutors. When our children need to learn how to ride a bike or how to swim, we farm those tasks out to trainers. When we want our children to know God, we put the burden on the church.
What do we do with our children then? Just feed and clothe them? (And some of us have domestic helpers to help with those tasks!) In Deuteronomy 6:6–7 God says,
"And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise."
God commands parents to teach their children diligently about him. The key word is diligently. Parents are not supposed to teach their children about God once in a while, nor to teach their kids something about God when the mood strikes them, nor to farm out their God-appointed responsibility to someone else. That would be being disobedient.
And when should parents teach their children about God? The same verses have the answer: when we wake up, when we go to bed, when we're walking outside, when we're at home. In other words, teach your children about God all the time.
I'll write more about how to teach. For now, the important thing to remember is that we are responsible for our children's spiritual training. Yes, ultimately, it is the work of the Holy Spirit. But God has ordained that we work in partnership with him. He commands us to teach him to our children. We must not be disobedient.
